Hell Yeah, I Rememeber Aurora

Photo belongs to Roswell Films/ HBO

The above quote is from me.  I said those words out loud to myself a few months ago and then added it to that stunning picture of Dave Grohl they kept using in the Sonic Highways promos.

I was in the middle of writing Sway and Ryan's story.  I was just at the part where they're really getting to know each other.  That fun, happy, you-know-good-and-well-it-can't-last stage.  And I was falling in love with them.

It was Dave's fault.

It's always his fault.

Every time I fall in love, he's playing the soundtrack in the background.

And I fall in love every time.

Each book I think that this couple will be the one, the ultimate couple.  I will love them the most and no one will ever replace them.  Then I get to the next story and the next soundtrack and it starts all over again.

Maybe that's just the way it has to be.  Maybe I can't honestly write their story unless I'm fully invested in the outcome.  That outcome being all the love ever forever.  With sprinkles on top.  

So here's the rub.  I'm working on a story right now that doesn't follow the pattern.

 It's a prequel (my betas have promised to not let me George Lucas the shit out of it).  

Ryan's origin story.

See, I got into this thing with her and Sway, and realized she was a very complicated woman.  So much so, that I couldn't get into all of it in Sway's book because it's Sway's book.  I floated the idea of writing her story and some of my pre-readers and close friends have encouraged it.  "Have at it, Plucky Duckling!  Hoist the mainsail!"

(They didn't use those words, that was in my head.  Judge away, there's so much more in there you don't know about.)

Ryan's story will be about who she is and how she became the Ryan we all meet in BRAND NEW SKY.  It's not a romance.  

But it is a love story.

Going through my notes, writing these first few chapters, I find myself falling in love with her. 

And guess who's playing the soundtrack? 

This novella's anthem is Foo Fighter's "Long Road to Ruin" because it's Ryan's song.  It's where she's at right now and it's not a great place.

But it will be. 

 

The One About Romance

It should come as no surprise that music is kind of a big deal for me.  Maybe it's because I have no musical talent whatsoever and so I'm drawn to its mystery.  Maybe it's because some of my earliest and most treasured memories are of my beautiful mother playing the guitar and singing me love songs.  I think those things probably tangled together to form a desire in my heart to explore it further.  Not the music so much, but the emotion behind the song.  The people, the story, the soul of the song.

I wanted to be a part of it.  

My small contribution to the writing world is my best attempt.  Yes, I write romance.  No, I'm not ashamed.

I want to take people on an adventure.  And if the slow, dangerous exploration of a person's heart isn't an adventure, then I don't know what is.

For what is more mysterious than the intricate layers and motivations of a man?  

What has led to more misunderstandings and more victories than the quiet diligence of his soul?  

What does he see?  What's the color of the sunset from out of his eyes?  What kind of memories are replayed with the sound of an old song on the radio?  Who is he?  Where is he going?  

Every story is another cliff dive for me.  

I stand on the ledge, feel the wind whip harshly at my body, stealing my breath. 

I'm going to jump.  Every time.

I have to tell the story.  Their story.

It's my song.

On to the next one.

Right Behind Me, Everywhere I Go

Good evening, gentle readers.
 It's been a while, yeah?

Growing pains is the only reason I can give as to my absence.  I mean, I could go into the details of what this summer had been like for me on a deeply personal level—digging into the dark emotional abyss that is my heart and laying it out on the floor for all to see.  But I won't.  Because it's just not me.  

I will tell you that this summer has been one of discovery.  

In the midst of all the happenings in my life, I finished a novel and thus the Double Blind Study series.  It's currently with the editor and dare I say, I'm proud of this one.  More so than the others.  Not because the writing is the best (it's not), and not because it's going to change anyone's life (it won't), but because of all the things I learned during it. 

I might be back in a couple days to unpack some of those things.  Right now I'm just sort of savoring this feeling.  It's quiet and simple and I'm enjoying it. 

No matter how hard life can get, there's always these amazing people who shine their light right into my life and save me.  I guess that's what I'm reflecting on tonight— the bright lights.

And I am grateful.